Brunch is ending, but if you go home now you’ll probably fall asleep on the couch. And considering you were talked into bottomless mimosas, it’s unlikely that you’ll manage that hike in Malibu later this afternoon. What you should do instead is continue drinking. But you don’t want to spend 20 tipsy minutes Googling bars that are fun when it’s light out - so we’ve done the hard work for you. This list of One-Two Punches is your roadmap to find a restaurant for a great brunch, and a place to get drinks nearby.
The one-two punches
Ostrich Farm serves fantastic, slightly fancy versions of breakfast classics, so it’s a great option when you’re in the mood for something different, and by different you mean you want prosciutto in your breakfast sandwich. Sit at the bar, order a ginger-lemon shandy, and banter with the bartender about the best and worst songs karaoke songs of all time.
Sunset Beer is right across the street from Ostrich Farm, and after more than one of those tangerine mimosas, that’s about as far as you’ll feel like walking. This beer store and bar has a huge bottle selection, a small tap list, and plenty of space for a big post-brunch group hang, especially if that group likes board games and saisons.
If you’ve ever been to a wedding shower and wished there were a lot fewer people and way better wine, then your next brunch should be at Esters. There are parents in nice outfits eating bagels and smoked fish, and a general feeling that everyone’s here to drink great champagne without letting things get out of hand. Order the nut butter and berry toast, along with the brunch burger, and eat them on one of Santa Monica’s most underrated patios.
There’s a lot of beach in Venice and Santa Monica, but really only one not-terrible rooftop that has a beach view. That bar is called High, and it’s on top of the Hotel Erwin. Unfortunately, that’s not a secret, so there will definitely be a crowd here on a weekend afternoon. After a bottle of prosecco at Ester’s though, all those people are much less likely to annoy you. Reserve a couch and you won’t have to wait at the bar, plus you’ll have a prime view for one of LA’s smoggy-but-excellent sunsets.
Your roommate just woke you up to tell you he accidentally backed into your car in the driveway. You’re cranky, but you told your friends you wouldn’t cancel on brunch (again), and Cafe Birdie has biscuits and gravy as well as the best brunch cocktails in Highland Park, which should be enough to get you out of bed. It doesn’t hurt that you’ll also feel like you’re in your potentially imaginary rich cousin’s French Provincial house in Napa. After a few Bloody Marys and some Moroccan-spiced chicken, you’ll barely notice the scratch on your bumper.
Block Party is the place to keep your Highland Park day drinking going, and not just because we don’t know anywhere else where the micheladas come with paletas. The patio is huge, and there’s a giant projector where you can challenge your friends to Wii Tennis and prove to them how cool you were in 2009.
There are “let’s just invite everyone” brunches, and then there are brunches where you just want to eat some Southern food in a not-too-loud room while pretending your headache has nothing to do with the red wine you drank last night. The dining room and patio at The Hart And The Hunter are small, so if it’s just you and a couple of friends ready for some biscuits with pimento cheese, this is a great place to start your day. The $20 bottomless mimosas might help with the headache, too.
The Surly Goat is a ten-minute walk from The Hart And The Hunter, and is a nice way to continue a laid-back Sunday. It’s one of few places in West Hollywood where you don’t have to deal with lines, $17 drinks, or bouncers that turn away your friend Dan because he’s wearing sandals. The selection of beers on tap here will impress anyone, but if you just know you like pale ales, the bartenders will happily help you out. There’s also a full bar, shuffleboard, some arcade games, and a great patio in the back.
When you’re at Playa Provisions, you’ll realize why people move to Playa del Rey: it’s quiet, close to the beach, and feels like you’re not in LA anymore. Head straight to the patio and you can pretend you’re actually sitting on the beach, but without the risk of getting attacked by a stingray. Have a great breakfast sandwich and a mai tai or two.
You usually associate open bars with your cousin’s wedding or your neighbor’s bar mitzvah, not wine bars by the beach. But Bacari PDR’s $25, 90-minute all-you-can-drink deal includes wine, champagne, and beer and is an excellent way to spend a Saturday afternoon. People are clearly here to drink, but Bacari manages to stay fairly low-key, so there’s no one here so sloppy that they’ll try to swim fully clothed at Dockweiler.
Idle Hour is one of the best bars in the Valley - it’s hard to beat drinking inside a giant wooden barrel - and it’s also a fantastic place for a surprisingly relaxed bottomless brunch. You can sit on the back patio next to a two-story sculpture of a dog smoking a pipe while you eat your steak and eggs and order the $15 bottomless deal.
Drinking dirt-cheap margaritas out of plastic goblets isn’t something you want to do every weekend, but every once in a while, it’s good to mix things up. The people at El Tejano know this, and they also know that you’re going to want a self-serve tortilla chip bin while you’re drinking that margarita. The bar is a few blocks down from Idle Hour, and has a bunch of games like cornhole and life-sized Connect Four in case you needed some sort of constructive excuse to spend the afternoon eating your weight in chips and getting a little rowdy.
This converted bungalow in Silver Lake has an excellent patio where you should plan to have a low-key morning with some carnitas hash before you go home and do two weeks worth of laundry. But they also do bottomless mimosas for $8, so there’s a good chance things are quickly going to become not-at-all low-key and your laundry is going to have to wait another week. The food isn’t going to blow you away, but will get the job done.
Head to the Red Lion after Barbrix to sit outside and drink beer out of glass boots while surrounded by people wearing store-bought paint-covered jeans and locals who have lived in the area since 1975. It’s easy to lose track of time here, but if it gets to dinner and everyone is hungry again, do what all the regulars around you do: order some sausage platters and giant pretzels.